"Life is the price we pay for running away from death "
































































How was it to see her in the arms of another man? Tell me, Sasha.. Hordes of ladies go fanatical at your sight, you surf upon waves of love and admiration, you are the darling of the nation, but your darling is not in your life anymore. Don't you cry thinking about it, Sasha?

The same lady that you so endearingly held, so lovingly hugged, who for the first time made you feel like you were not just flirting for fun, but actually finding happiness in the depth of your heart. The one whose embrace gave you more joy than the success of all your films put together. Then how things went awry, you have no idea. You are still dumbfounded, aren't you? You still ask yourself whether it was a break-up or a break-down.

And while you still ponder, she has already found her home in the cuddle of another man. The same man, that you couldn't find respect for, right from your earliest days. The man who you felt came in this industry by birth and not by talent. She lovingly calls him Saifu, yet you know there's nothing 'saif' (safe) about him. He is a dangerous megalomaniac, who trapped her for her fame. It would keep him in the limelight, forever! He is a plotter, a bloody opportunist. He uses his 'silver spoon' to a sliver effect. You knew it, but you couldn't stop her.

She wouldn't listen to you, and if you had tried to stop her, she would have done it even more eagerly. Why did she start hating you so much, Sasha? She was your baby. Is that why you named her Bebo? You both would snuggle up and sleep at nights. Now you sleep alone. You are a 'success story' to the world, but your own mirror mocks at you now. How do you even confess your failures to someone, nobody would believe that you are so weak!



During the days you are a hero, on the sets and the streets, wherever you go, but at nights, in the loneliness of your bed, you choke on your own feeling of uselessness, don't you? Haven't you yearned for the warmth of her body on chill winter nights? Haven't you sought the coolness of her breath on dry summer days? You tried to make friends but none bonded with you so well like your Bebo did - Mimi was just too egoistic, Silk was so slippery she just slipped out one day, Masakali too grew wings and flew out. They all came and went, but Bebo had stayed well beyond the limits of today's cosmopolitan tolerance. The others just tried to carve a place in your heart, while Bebo lived in your veins. Bebo was like your blood, which took life out of your heart and spread it all over your body. Where is all that life gone now, Sasha? Don't you feel dead sometimes?

At nights, don't you miss her even more? Her silken touch, her butter-like body. The way she would spread herself and take you on, life would look like a bed of roses. Doesn't it kill you to think that another man, that rapscallion scoundrel, would be making love to her now? Your rose is adorning someone else's bed, Sasha,  and looks like she left the thorns behind for you. Don't the thorns prick your soul? Don't they deflate your ego, Sasha? But it's too late to do anything now, isn't it? She already has that scumbag's blood in her body. Didn't you read the news about her pregnancy? and then didn't you bang the laptop on the wall? Break all that you want, Sasha, they can all be mended.. but not your heart, not your broken life. Today morning, you broke the mirror in the bathroom, and when you looked into those pieces lying on the floor, which one appeared more shattered? The mirror or your face in it?

You still vividly remember those days 'Jab you Met' her, don't you? How bubbly she was and the life she infused into the early morning and late night shoots. How you both took long walks in the mustard fields and the fun you had playing by the stream. Don't you still recall that evening at the beach, where she had built that sand castle and you had watched the setting sun form a halo around her head and imagined her to be an angel, who descended upon your life, like a blessing from heaven. Today, the same sunset burns your eyes, doesn't it? The castle that she built was swept over by the waves, but don't you still build your castles in the air, Sasha?

You put up a brave face to the world and to your family, but how long can you hold your breath underwater, Sasha? You will keep praying God, not for strength, but for her happiness. You will keep giving hits to the world, and keep taking hits on your heart. You will continue shooting, you will continue to be a star, but you will also continue watching for shooting stars, that will carry your wishes to her.

However big you grow in age, fame or in stature, two things about you will never change, one, being a kid in the eyes of your mother, and two, repenting for understanding the meaning of love only after it was too late. Isn't that right, Sasha? 
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