"A profound unmitigated loneliness is the only truth of life"
- R.K. Narayan

Wish life was like a buffet meal, where one need not stand in line, or rush for a seat; one could take what one wants and ignore the rest. Sadly though, it isn't. Turns out life's actually much closer to lunch served on the table. Not only do we need to fight for a place, we are served the stuff that we never asked for, stuff that we may not be able to digest, and we have to eat it all.. just because all the other's do!

The Economist:
There is so much disorder in a buffet meal, isn't it? Each takes what he wants and roams around. One can't allow indiscipline for the sake of freedom. Life has to be served on the table and everyone should partake of it in a definite sequence. Everyone gets his due, and even if they don't like what they get, at least they should be happy that the resources are being shared with everyone. Lunch on the table is efficient lunch.

The Environmentalist:
Buffet lunches are not optimal on the environment. As people take what they like, most of them go for the better dishes and the not-so-good ones get wasted. Also, some people pile up food on their plates and end up not eating it all. On the table, people finish their plates because they know others are watching.

The Sociologist:
Life has to be a meal on the table; each has to eat the stuff precisely because all the others do. That's exactly the point. Social life is human nature. Following the community is what we humans do best.

The Political Activist:
Serving on the table is democracy. People can eat what they like and are free to leave the rest. But it is imperative that all sit at the same table and be treated as equals. There cannot be discrimination. The tables and serving should be managed by the authorities. Buffet meal is communism. Down with it!

The Psychologist (Therapist):
When people sit around comfortably and get distracted during their meal, they tend to eat more. Sure cause for obesity or constipation. Put them on the tables, and let them focus on the food while they are at it. No walking or talking. Let them eat what they want and realize they are full, when they are full. It will also train families to sit and eat together at their dining tables at home. Lunch on the table is a mentally healthy lunch.

The Biologist (Physicist):
When people sit quietly at their table, there is very less intermixing and hence, decreases chances of contamination. One diseased person cannot go around infecting the whole room. Also, food comes out of one central location, rather than being prepared at different stalls, so quality can be managed better.

The Security Engineer:
Crowds are better managed when they are organized. One set of guards to watch the tables and one set to line up the others waiting for lunch. In a buffet, everyone is waiting, everyone is eating, and everyone is roaming around. It's a security dilemma. On the table, they are all slotted and we can keep an eye on each one of them.

The Terrorist:
Moving targets are difficult to aim at. When they are lined up on a table, it is easier to gun them down! :o)

Life, for the social and practical scientists, is already in pretty-much optimal shape. Would you agree?